I am infatuated with the Timehop app. Not only does it help refresh my memory, which deteriorates by the day, but it is a helpful reminder on how I have changed and grown.
When I take action to do something to enhance or improve my circumstances, I create my own future. It is a process of accountability full of opportunities to screw up, regain my composure and try again. Not a perfect process, but I think the most courageous thing to do is to make an honest effort.
Hidden beyond the muddy exterior of life, lies the peace within myself. Life is blend of murky, uncertain paths that can lead us away from our primary purpose. It is with great reserve that I must pause, regroup, and sometimes wait until I feel the path is the right one. Within that process is my new found ability to remain emotionally neutral. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, I am able to not allow myself to create an emotional attachment to the outcome. It is not an easy task. Sometimes I catch myself clinging to “my solution” rather than trusting what my Higher Power has in store. It is only natural as I am a control freak. Waiting is not my strong suit and not getting what I think I “need” and “want” can bring out the diva in me at a moment’s notice.
The realization of not knowing what is ahead of me creates a mystery that can be filled with anxiety, but also anticipation. I just need to make sure that their is more anticipating in the mix rather than my anxious feelings.