Why it is that we can instantly feel shamed or guilty even if we are doing what is right for ourselves? I know the pattern of my tangled mindset where I start to believe those feelings that are churning within my being. I guess I was programmed by my mother. Bless her heart, she brought me up with a great deal of wonderful attributes, but her generation also brought shame and guilt within their baggage. From a young age, I could swim in shame as a result of not living up to people’s unrealistic expectations. At the time, I didn’t realize they were unrealistic, I just thought I was disappointing people.
The realization for me is to be mindful of how I perceive myself. It is important that I quiet those voices that tell me I am not enough with voices who affirm and support me. Sounds crazy, I know, but I am my own limitation. The obstacle that stops me from acknowledging I am enough and I do enough. So much guilt and shame can smother me at a moment’s notice. I just need to recognize that if someone is shaming me, then that is reflection of them. Sometimes the greatest gift I can give myself is the affirmation of forgiving myself and others.