Sometimes I am amazed at the power of the mind. So vast and complicated, yet so simplistic. The mind is easy to manipulate. It can falsify any experience and can literally make you question yourself. Through this emotional cleanse, my mind has been an evil twin. It has showered me with an abundance of guilt and has made me question my motives. Although, I have received many affirmations of the steps I am taking to in order to care of myself, there is that twinge of regret. Part of that has evolved from a sense of responsibility to my family members that are affected by my decisions.
To make that right, I have made amends to such people. The twist is those individuals have basically brushed it off as they have never really had an intimidate relationship with these individuals. It surprised me how distorted my mind can get when dealing with a situation with an emotional component. I have to remind myself that I didn’t make this decision lightly. There is grief that comes with moving forward. Losing any relationship is difficult, but today, I desire and want healthy, honest and loving relationships. So, while my mind is off and running in different directions, I will be thoughtful that sometimes my process of thinking can resemble the distorted mirrors found at the carnival.