The epitome of spiritually maturing is when I can honestly think about a situation that really affected me, and it no longer triggers any emotion. When I was talking to my mother yesterday, I realized that she is hoarding her extensive excess baggage that she has been dragging behind her for years. At 84 years old, she has experienced a great deal of disappointment and heartache, which she chooses to hang on to like a life preserver. As I listen to her share, I am saddened by her inability to let things go.
With her emotional components nestled into to her being, it is no wonder that she suffers from physical ailments that are manifested from all of her baggage. An ordinary blip on the screen for most of us, can send her into a tailspin. The pattern has been there all of my life, but the older she gets, the quicker it catches up to her.
I came by it honestly. It was easy for me to take a situation and blow it out of proportion. My perception was skewed and I held grudges like nobody’s business. When I began to realize that my way of dealing was somewhat drastic, I vowed to do it differently. To be fair, my mother was a victim of her upbringing. Surrounded by chaos, she didn’t have the tools to teach me any different.
I am human, so naturally, I can still hold a resentment. The difference today is I have the tools to release it. Staying in the past is no longer residential property. I have moved onto a neighborhood that is far more peaceful and easy to navigate. Life is hard enough without dragging the disappointments of the past with me. Living my life with no regrets allows my journey to be a little complicated.