So, I went for my MRI today to evaluate my right knee. I imagine that my ligaments were in the shape of the third finger flipping the technician off. For forty minutes, I laid completely still and listened to country music. I detest country music, so the only welcoming sound was when the machine was humming and drowned out the relentless lyrics of some poor guy who lost his girl. Whatever………..
After about 10 minutes, I was able to flow into a meditative state. Grateful, that I can turn my mind off and really focus on just being still, which obviously was easy since I had no choice. The forty minutes melted away and I was released from the captivity of the MRI machine. Not knowing the results until next week, I continued on with my day. The interesting thing is explaining my situation to people. Naturally, there is confusion on which knee since I injured the left one in December. Don’t worry…..even the technician for my MRI was confused and so was my doctor. What can I say, I thrive on confusion.
The responses have varied with this particular situation because I am not limping consistently. I appear to be perfectly balanced, but then my knee will lock up because this part of my body hates me. I suppose all the boot camps and mini-marathons may be one of the reasons they have it in for me. I can’t blame them, but boy, I wish they would have waited.
The nuggets of suggestions from non medical personnel is fantastic. Don’t you love people giving you suggestions or advice when you haven’t asked for any? Yes, I adore it.
“Why don’t you have a knee replacement?” “You should wear a brace.” “You should get a second opinion.” Blah Blah Blah
The word “should” is actually a criticism. It basically means “you aren’t doing enough, so you must do this in order for you to be okay”. I know people mean well. There is no ill intent, but the more questions and suggestions that I receive, the more I want silence.
So, I wait. I wait to hear next Friday if this will require surgery or not. In the meantime, I will be the woman who appears to be fine until her knee locks up and she, as graceful as possible, will limp to her destination.