Sitting in the back of church this morning, I noticed something moving out of the corner of my eye. In the middle of the aisle, resided a spider. No slouch in the size department, it was easy to keep track of his movements. As I sharply focused on this creature, others in my area began to notice as well. We were all fixated on the destination, and probably hoping, as I was, that the spider was moving in the opposite direction of where I was seated. What is the proper etiquette of dealing with a spider in the house of God? Is killing said spider a mortal sin since it is technically one of His creatures? Is screaming appropriate when said spider happens to crawl up your leg? It was an interesting few minutes of observation until the spider scurried away in the opposite direction of where I was seated.
My spider story does have a point. When I am fearful situation, I am fixated on how everything will turn out and my control issues are heightened. I can only focus on the issue at hand and am drawn into a hypnotic state as I rationalize an outcome that I can’t control. My reactions are prickly while I appear that I have my shit together. It is a facade. It is my reality. It is changeable behavior.
The real issue is the ability to take chances while telling fear to take a backseat. My experience shows me that when I let fear make my decisions, while safer, I will never know what the real outcome would have been. I might have shut the door on something life changing or at the very least enjoyable.
I want fear to be like the spider…..scurrying off on the opposite direction of where I am residing. I want fear to have enough faith in me that I can move forward and experience life on different terms. I know the burning question you have is what would I have done if the spider would have ventured my way? Well, that’s simple, I would have stepped on him and then prayed for forgiveness. Just like I want to step on fear.
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