Square Peg ● Round Hole

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I feel like if the Chinese were renaming this year, it would be the year of the knee.  It started right before the holidays.  I tore my ACL in my left knee.  A victim of a Basset chasing a bunny gone wrong.  Recovery was easy and I was able to resume my regular programming.  In March, I tore my meniscus in my right knee.  While I would love to relay an exciting adventure, it was me merely standing up to unload the dishwasher.  The year of the knee slowly took a turn for a destination unknown.  Surgery was done in April, but the tear was so bad that they removed the meniscus.   My right knee is angry about the abrupt departure of its long time companion, the medial meniscus.  So much so, that it is sucking the quality of my life dry.   You see, I am 49 and suddenly I feel 80.   It doesn’t help that my spry 85 year old mother walks faster than me.   When we are together, she aids my walking instead of the other way around….which makes this situation even more annoying.

An active conversation regarding a knee replacement has been ongoing for the last few months.  It has been apparent that I am in more pain now, and yesterday, I finally said the words that I have been hesitating to say…..”Show me my new knee!”.   Okay, I didn’t really say that, but within seconds of my doctor walking in the door, I simply said, “I’m done.”   Done with pain….done with my bad, bitchy attitude…..and most of all, done denying that this is the next logical step in order for me to kick the aging process in the balls.  Of course, I will kick it in the balls once the knee has healed.

I wasn’t prepared for his next statement…….”I have a cancellation.  Let’s do it August 9.”  I almost peed a little in my pants, which probably needs to be addressed, but I can only deal with one geriatric problem at a time.   While I am on board with the surgery, I thought I would have a little bit of time to get used to the idea, but God always laughs at me in these circumstances.  So, two weeks from today, this 49 year old woman will venture into the world of replacement parts.   Like a used car, the upkeep is getting tiresome, but I am optimistic that this course of action, will provide me with twenty plus years of decent mileage.

So, accepting these circumstances allows me to get in the right frame of mind.  Acceptance doesn’t mean I like what is happening, it just means that it is the next right thing to do.   There is nothing I can do to change the situation, but my attitude sprinkled with a touch of humor will accelerate the healing process along with a lot of help from my support system.