I am quick to jump to conclusions even without additional information to fill in the empty spaces. Recently, I have been looking at this unattractive quality with intrigue rather than shame wondering how I could change that perspective to enhance my outlook. Today, I ventured out for lunch with a friend. I arrived a few minutes before her and was seated in a cozy corner. I happen to like corner tables as no one can invade it, well because, it is my corner. Anyway, after ten minutes of being ignored, I started to become annoyed, indignant, and my attitude of gratitude quickly changed to an attitude of bitchiness. Then I paused, remembering that I want this to be the year of intention, mindfulness, and realizing that we all just doing the best we can.
I got the attention of this older gentleman who worked there and explained my dilemma. He quickly alerted the manager and shared that the waitress was new and assured me that she was very good. In the meantime, my attitude had quickly shifted back to gratitude. We chatted a few minutes when he shared that he had been in the restaurant industry for a while. He referenced himself as “just” a busboy. At that moment, I was aware of how we downplay our importance when we describe ourselves as “just” a mom or “just” a wife.
After my lunch with my friend, I asked our waitress if she could send the busboy over to our table. When he arrived, I expressed my appreciation for how wonderful he was at his job and that I felt like he laid the foundation for me to return again.
Now, I am not sharing this because I want brag or I need you to affirm that I am a good person. Nope, I am sharing this because I think it is important that we validate each other. That when someone says they are “just” this, we can firmly state that they are more than just a title or a circumstance. There is a ripple effect when you express the goodness that you see in someone. It expands beyond the limits of human consciousness and spreads a touch of kindness into this cold, somewhat unforgiving world. Not only that, but it filled me up too. It was a connection……his name is Alfred and he is more than just a busboy.