Square Peg ● Round Hole







In my line of work, it is important that I implore a level of customer service.  I know, you are probably wondering why a writer must convey that particular asset.   If I want people to participate in my article, I must be kind.  I must be personable, relatable, and in some cases, tolerate pretentious individuals who think their shit resembles glitter with a scent of roses.

Thank God that the occurrences of those types of individuals are few and far between. When they do happen, it is like a ninja in the night eager to pounce on my sparkling personality.    But, I handle it like the professional that I am.  On Monday, I spoke with a potential subject who was concerned about the level of attention that the article would give her family.   It didn’t really matter if we used their names or not as I could feature the home piece anonymously.  Writing it strictly from the point of view of the architect.  While talking with her, I found my voice matching her haughtiness.  She was using phrases like “we are very important people” which is code for “do you know who we are”.  I didn’t.  Still don’t.  And, don’t care.

We ended our discussion with their names not being used.   Normally, I would use a comforting sales pitch to ease their minds, but I was grateful she didn’t want to participate.  The few minutes that I dealt with her made me realize that she would be royal pain in my ass.   When we ended our conversation, I said, “Buh-bye” with a very exaggerated blend of pretentious meets sarcasm.   It is my way of making fun of this ridiculous conversation.  She was clueless in my attempt.

Honestly, when I got off of the phone, I felt a little sorry for her.  Sorry that she feels the need to represent herself in such a manner.  Sorry that she can’t be authentic. But, maybe that is her being real.  Whatever the case, it made me even more grateful that I surround myself with those who don’t feel the need to camouflage themselves.  Life is too short to be anything but yourself.