Square Peg ● Round Hole







Today, marks thirteen years that my Dad left this earthly plane.   I long for his presence, his calm demeanor and his contagious smile.   There are some events in life where you remember every single details.  Life moments, like the birth of my children and the death of my father, run like a movie scene. 

Two days before he passed away, my parents were with friends in Indianapolis.  He wasn’t feeling well and the weather wasn’t really conducive to someone in a wheelchair, so he opted to stay at the hotel where he ordered room service, watched a U of L game on television and called me – for what I know now – would be our last conversation.  He was in a wonderful mood as we continued to talk about everything and nothing.  

My other gratitude was being present when he left this earth.   Since he was completely against ambulances, Brian and I were going to transport him to the hospital.  He came home from Indianapolis feeling worse than when I talked to him two days prior.  Being on dialysis for sixteen years along with the loss of his leg, physical ailments were always a cause for concern.   As we were trying to navigate his body into the car, we knew that an ambulance would be the only way.  So, Brian gently laid him on the garage floor where only his physical shell remained.   He literally died in my husband’s arms.

I can still hear his laugh, remember his voice, and most of all, feel his presence when I need him the most.   He was the one person, on this planet, who accepted me for me.  My boys got to spend some great years with their Pawpaw.  His legacy continues and while I miss him with a voracious intensity, I know that he has been with me in spirit, every step of the way.