Square Peg ● Round Hole

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I know that you all have barely been able to sleep wondering how this dress situation would work out for the family wedding we are attending today. Well, I am proud to say that I lit that bitch up. Or in layman’s terms, I found the one or quite possibly, two.

My aversion to walking into an actual store versus online shopping stems from the interaction that I would need to engage in with other humans. But, because we are less than 48 hours from the ceremony, time was of the essence. When I shop, it as if I am an operative on a secret mission. The target is the outfit and the goal is to be out in under 20 minutes. Yesterday was no different. My laser beam vision scoped out a precious dress and then next to it, was another one. Winning. I went to the dressing room (no, that isn’t a lie, I actually tried them on at the store), and took photos of each of them on me and sent them to one of best friends. She provided another set of eyes and an objective opinion. Both fit. Both looked amazing. Both went home with me. Fun fact, both were a size 8. Haven’t worn that dress size in years. Oh, and no Spanx required. Boom! Drop the mic.

Anyway, with that accomplished in less than 15 minutes, I went to conquer the human interaction piece. It was super easy since the lady was not overly friendly. She was singing along with the 80s music that was piped in to really add to the overall shopping experience. That’s cool, because honestly, the less effort I have to make with idle chatter the better for me.

Maybe I should have just simply gone outside of the walls of my home to find my dress in the first place. Who am I kidding? This is my process, plus it really adds to my writing material. Mission “Find a dress” accomplished and no one had to die.