Square Peg ● Round Hole







I knew it was coming. I mean, ever since we have been practicing our isolation technique, I was already in the acceptance that our Disney cruise would be cancelled. Remember, acceptance doesn’t mean I like it, it just means it is the reality. Honestly, there are bigger problems in the world than our vacation being dismissed.

One of my friends, who happens to have had a Disney cruise scheduled for June, texted me on Monday, “Happy Cruise Cancellation Day”. I had not received an email about it, but knew from various sources that the decision had been confirmed. When I finally received the email, the directions for obtaining the refund were clear as mud. Or maybe it was me. Remember my Monday included a temperamental oven, an elderly mother demanding new underwear, and an overabundance of chicken strips. My mind was cluttered. My friend was kind enough to dissect that email for me and shared that if I wanted the full refund, I would need to call. Ugh.

Yesterday, I settled in my favorite chair, accessed the book that I have been reading on my Kindle, and dialed the number. The perky recording asked for my reservation number and then told me that because there are a high volume of calls, there be a magical wait time. I was prepared for that and so I put my phone on speaker while I resumed reading my book. While on hold, various Disney songs were played. On occasion, the perky recorded guy would pop in advising callers on how to obtain flights for their upcoming cruise. Yeah, buddy, don’t think that is even a thing. Maybe they need to delete that portion for now.

“When You Wish Upon a Star” started playing and I thought that maybe that isn’t the most appropriate song for callers to hear while mourning the loss of their vacation. I mean, the song says, “anything your heart desires will come to you”. Obviously not, as I sit and wait for a friendly customer service representative to give me my money back.

Then that song ends and “Be Our Guest” begins. Seriously. Do they not understand the irony of these musical selections? I had to laugh. No, I will not be your guest because some asshole virus decided to disrupt our lives. Life has basically been cancelled.

Miraculously, the friendly agent answers my call after a magical thirty-five minutes. She was efficient and within three minutes, my call was complete and the refund was processed. While normally, it takes seven to ten days, because of the shit show that this virus has created, it is now thirty to forty-five days before the refund will make an appearance.

Maybe next year, I will be their guest on another cruise. But for now, I will overindulge in chicken strips and Jeni’s ice cream (my new obsession), while pretending that I am at an all-can-eat-buffet like they have on the Disney ships. I should have Brian learn how to make animals out of towels and put them on our bed each night. However, I have a feeling that the testosterone individuals that reside here, will be unwilling to provide the same customer service that I have grown accustomed to while cruising on their ships. I guess, I will simply wish upon a star and let it go.