Square Peg ● Round Hole







Yesterday, I shared that I was pitching my manuscript to three literary agents during a virtual writing workshop. Let me just say, if technical issues were a drinking game, I would have been drunk. Christ. On. A. Ritz. Cracker.

My first pitch was at 9:15. I logged on to Zoom, put in the meeting ID and then it asked for a password. Password? They didn’t supply me with a password. So, I am emailing the coordinator who just happens to be in a webinar that he is hosting. I know that this particular ship has sailed for now, so I take a breath and wait until my next pitch, which was slated for 11:15.

I psych myself up again – (it’s exhausting) – and log on to my second pitch, which did have a password supplied. Praise Jesus. However, my internet disconnected. I am literally on my knees praying to anyone that would listen, to help a sister out. Finally, I get that situated but it left me with five minutes to sell her, as these sessions are only ten minutes long. I had my pitch taped to the back of my computer as a reference so I didn’t miss anything. She was a tough cookie to crack. In the end, she passed me on to one of her colleagues, as she felt it would be a better fit for her. After we finished, I looked up the agent she was referring me to. This lady is the VP of the agency, and the recipient of an Editor of the Year award from the American Christian Fiction Writers. Previously, she was the Marketing Manager for the Christian Living line at another publishing company. Friends, I use the F-word a lot in this book plus there is some inappropriate humor. I mean, not inappropriate to me because I love that shit, but I am not sure she will be my target audience. In any event, I will send it to her. Maybe she cusses like a sailor behind closed doors.

The second pitch was a little more my speed. She was friendly and encouraging asking me about my social media presence, which is very important in terms of promotion. After we chatted, with no technical difficulties blocking our interaction, she asked me to send her the first three chapters along with a query letter. Two down. One more to go.

My last pitch which should have been my first, was rescheduled to 4:15. I logged on with the meeting ID and password, but there is no audio. It’s me. I am the problem. My nerves were so heightened that I forgot to unmute my audio. Anyway, I go right into my pitch and she proceeds to ask me what genre my book is. That is the question of the day. One agent said women’s fiction while the other said it was more romance. But, this lady gave me some clarity which made me realize that this is indeed women’s fiction. Sure, there is a romantic component, but it is not the main focus of the story. So, as we finished up, she asked for three chapters plus the query letter.

Last year, I was so excited that agents were interested in this book. This year, I am underwhelmed. Maybe it was all the technical difficulties that took the wind out of my sail. Who knows. I will send it off to them and maybe I will be surprised. It is possible that being underwhelmed is to my advantage. My expectations will be more realistic and it allows me to be open to whatever comes my way.

I will spend this week sending the requested items to these agents and release the outcome. Although, after taking Daisy out at 1 a.m., I did order some ice cream to be delivered. I feel like those people that order from QVC in the middle of the night. I am using the excuse that the whole day stressed me out and I needed a reward. That’s my reasoning. I can’t be held responsible for my actions when I am half-asleep. In fact, I thought it was just a dream until I saw the email confirming my order. Oh well, at least my taste buds will thank me. Don’t worry, Debbie, I will count it in my macros, even if I eat the whole container.