Square Peg ● Round Hole







I am the type of person to slowly emerge myself into a pool while others, without checking the temperature, take the plunge. The shock of the cold soon wears off and they enjoy the benefits of the water while I am still sitting on the side allowing myself to adapt. It is similar to this quarantine situation.

I have spent close to 500 days, (cue my exaggeration), in closed quarters with three adult males. I have observed all of the suggestions to keep myself and my family safe. Social distancing. Having Brian put his work clothes in the washer immediately after coming home. Leaving his work shoes outside to avoid any contamination from his place of employment, where they have had several confirmed cases of COVID-19. Adorable masks including a new one with my initials monogrammed on it. It was a gift from one of my best friends and it goes with everything. This is so important since this is now a necessary accessory. After all of that, do you really think that I am going to take a leap of faith to ditch all my hard work?

We were invited to a cookout yesterday. It would take place outside which is an example of my willingness to dip my toe in the water. I accepted on my family’s behalf but I allowed each person to make their own decision about their comfort level. Honestly, that would only be Bryce since Bailey and Brian are all about getting the hell out of this house to see other faces besides ours.

Close to the time we would have been going, the weather decided to give us the finger and an outside cookout would be moved indoors. Ummmm…..that’s a big, fat “no” from me. But, I allowed my other family members to decide for themselves. Bryce opted to stay home with me while the other two ventured out. Before they left, I asked Bailey to recite our newly adopted socializing rules……1. No touching other people and maintain social distancing. 2. Wear your mask unless you are eating. 3. Don’t share food with anyone and only let your Dad help you if needed. He reluctantly recited them to me and promptly rolled his eyes. “I know what I am doing. I am an adult”. Yes, he is, but we have worked so hard distancing ourselves in an effort to stay healthy, that I am a little hesitant for him to leave. He is high-risk. Brian is high-risk. Watching Bailey leave made me uncomfortable. I would say it made me uncomfortable for Brian leaving, but he has been golfing and working through this whole Pandemic, so he is basically on his own. He and I have differing views on this whole situation. But, he has been willing to adopt practices in order for me to feel safe. That’s is love, friends.

Social media is littered with photos of people taking the plunge. I get it. Really, I do. People are saying, “We made it”. Not sure what that means. Summer? Quarantine release? I don’t feel like we have made it. We will have made it when there is a cure and a vaccine. We will have made it when hospitals are not inundated with cases or when I am no longer paranoid about other people’s socializing habits.

My pace is slow. I am respectful of other people’s decision to take the plunge back into our new reality. “You do you, boo”, is my mantra. I am powerless over people, places and things. Others might not understand my thinking, and that is super cool. You don’t have to. I am just going to sit to the side and take my time.