We are a society forever doomed to cater to what is deemed acceptable. What will people think if they knew the truth? Acting as if we okay when we are not. Pretending that we have our shit together when we don’t. In light of Simone Biles owning her truth by honoring what is best for her, I find myself applauding her authenticity despite the critics who say it’s because she is afraid of failing. WTAF? It takes tremendous courage to own your truth. We are a society who still believe ignorance is bliss. Ignore the problem and it will disappear. After what we have all been through with COVID-19, being quarantined, not knowing what curve ball will be thrown next, our mental health has taken a hit. What Simone did puts mental health front and center which makes people uncomfortable. God forbid we actually embrace the obvious.
I am not okay. Losing my mother, then a close family friend, plus settling an estate has left me feeling unsettled. Instead of pushing through and honoring deadlines, forcing the creative process, and ignoring the grief, I have taken a timeout. I am tired of making decisions. I am tired of people interjecting their opinions on my decisions. I am particularly weary talking about the estate and all the work that goes with it. I just want to skip the hard stuff and be done with it. Unfortunately, that is not how life works and I know, from past experience, that I am on the cusp of goodness. I just have to walk through the discomfort to get there.
It’s hard to admit that I am unsettled, but it my truth. The good news is that while I am currently not okay, I know I will be.