Square Peg ● Round Hole

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I know I have been lapsed in my blog posts. Honestly, the urge to write has dwindled. I think maybe I needed a break from the constant pressure that I put on myself to produce entertaining content. Is writer burnout a thing? Well, I just coined it, if it isn’t. My focus has shifted a bit to a new chapter called, “My Health Journey”. It is riveting, friends.

When I turned 55, I was blissfully unaware that my health was shifting until I had an episode where I had blurry vision. It was compounded by chronic headaches and vertigo. I am not going to lay out the entire saga because it feels like an anthology, but I will say that I documented everything as I felt my situation was not simply a blip. My very detailed account was in an effort to advocate for myself. I knew that something wasn’t right. Sure, it is easy to ignore, but my Higher Power was pretty insistent that I follow His nudges or GOD (Good Orderly Direction).

I was referred to a neurologist after my primary care physician felt that my concern was warranted. My initial visit was amazing. His bedside manner was incredible and he adored my very thorough timeline. We formulated a game plan that resulted in treatments for my vertigo, along with protocol for treating my headaches, and an MRI for shits and giggles.

The MRI confirmed that I had a brain, which sometimes, I question, but it also revealed that I had a small stroke at some point. My reaction was anxiety partnered with “Oh shit”. This resulted in a battery of tests being ordered. We have ruled out a clotting disorder (YAY!!) but still are working through some other findings. It is a process. One that I am learning to trust.

Because of this journey, I have added blood pressure, cholesterol, and a baby aspirin to my repertoire. I have also committed to a pill box where I organize all of my delightful medication. This is life, friends. I have choices. I can choose my reaction. I can opt to be grateful that I love myself enough to advocate for my health. I chose peace. I chose to tweak my lifestyle. I chose to let people in and be supported. My health diagnosis doesn’t define me. It is simply another chapter in my life. I get to age. I get to experience life on life’s terms. Right there is the magic of acceptance. I don’t have to like it, but I get to make the choice on how I walk through it. Find the blessings. Feel the gratitude.