Square Peg ● Round Hole







Nine more days until I am free of my cast prison. It has been a learning experience considering that the last time I had this surgery, I relegated myself to using a scooter. This time, I threw caution to the wind and opted for crutches to be paired with the scooter giving me plenty of options.

Honestly, I was a bit nervous using the crutches, but I have found them to be easily mastered. People told me that my armpits would be sore, but I have amazing upper body strength, so that has not been an issue. Navigating has been effortless and I wonder why I was so reluctant in using them. Oh, maybe, I thought I would kill myself on them. Yep. That was my reasoning.

This past Saturday, we attended the last home game of the college where my youngest is attending grad school and working. The previous game, I only used crutches because I was delusional in thinking how easy it would be, only to realize that I might be a moron. It was horrendous, so I decided this time, I would combine the efforts. When I shared my idea with my spouse, he reminded me that he had suggested the wheelchair, but that I ignored him. That doesn’t sound like me at all. I am not stubborn and am incredibly open to other people’s suggestions. (Insert laughter because obviously, I march to my own drummer.) I would ask for an instant replay to confirm he did indeed suggest that, but we all know that the replay would prove he was right, and nobody needs that kind of negativity.

Effortless until it wasn’t. That is how I would describe game day. The wheelchair was amazing. In fact, I really like being paraded around like royalty, but I also don’t want to draw too much attention to myself. Unfortunately, this is me we are talking about, and it is inevitable that attention will gravitate my way. After kickoff, we were directed to seats near the door to the club area. I was so pleased that I would be able to access it without issue, that I ignored a glaring red flag. As I positioned myself to sit down, I propped my crutches against the rail, not realizing the gap. One of my crutches goes flying down three rows of bleachers. If I could have hidden, I would have, but it’s hard to do that with a cast on my leg. There was a slow motion quality to its peril. Fortunately, I didn’t harm anyone when my crutch went rogue, but everyone in the section turned to stare at me. This is not the kind of attention I was seeking, so, I did the only thing I could, I apologized while aggressively pointing at my cast. Lady, they get it. Mortifying. I tried not to take it personally that the couple sitting next to me, left not too long after I hurled my crutch into the unsuspecting crowd. Coincidence? I think not. It probably is safer being far away from me.