Square Peg ● Round Hole







The gap of gender goes beyond the pay scales and equal opportunity. It extends to even the most basic task…..dressing. We were invited to Oaks this past weekend and it would naturally bring up the question, what are we wearing? In the relationship that I have spent the majority of my life in, two questions are vital….. do you have a clean suit and does it fit? It is imperative to ask in advance because in the past, we could be found running around stores searching for a new suit an hour before needing to leave. Men have it very easy. They don’t have to worry about Spanx, panty hose or any other undergarment necessary to complete the outfit. They just show up.

While Brian sailed down easy street in his clean suit that fit, I was weighing my options. I had purchased a dress a couple of years ago, that I hadn’t worn yet, so I figured that would be my best choice. It was a teal swing dress that dropped low in the back which meant I needed to figure out a way to contain the “girls”. I opted for self-adhesive cups that you just stick right on and the “girls” are magically contained. Except I think they made them for women with perky “girls”. Mine are aiming for the job of a street sweeper. As long as I was standing up, they were amazing. The moment I sat down, the adhesive shifted and my “girls” gravitated toward my stomach. Trying to be sly while adjusting their position was tedious. I think I decided after a few times that I didn’t give a shit who saw it.

The important takeaway is that I probably need to be more mindful in finding appropriate undergarments and that my “girls” aren’t perky enough for self-adhesive bras.