It is a parent’s prerogative to gush about their kids.   They are our shining light and even when the tough stuff arises, there is simply nothing better than seeing your kids happy, successful, and thriving.   Bryce went through a stint where he really didn’t want anything to do with Bailey.   Between his last year in grade school and freshman year of high school, he did anything he could to distance himself from his special needs brother.  I don’t blame him.  Living in the shadow of an older sibling can be difficult, but when that individual has Down syndrome and people are constantly drawn to him, it adds another layer to the situation.

I didn’t push their relationship and I even had an open conversation with Bryce.   It wasn’t in any way an apology for the attention Bailey receives, but rather an explanation.  You see, as I told Bryce, as much as I want things “fair” and “even” for our boys, that is unrealistic.  Bailey requires extra of everything.   After that, I stepped out of their relationship and allowed it to grow at its own pace.

So, yesterday, as we ate dinner, discussed the day, and went over the schedule for next year (Yes, Bryce just registered for his JUNIOR year of high school. OY!), I was surprised to hear the next conversation.  Bailey was talking about the next home basketball game and how he would like to go.   I told him that I could drop him off and maybe, someone would like to go with him.   The miracle is when Bryce volunteered to accompany him.  No pressure was put on him and he was allowed to arrive at this place of comfort in his own time.

In my head, I was jumping up and down.  Calmly, I thanked him for his willingness and so, tonight, Bailey and Bryce will go to Trinity’s basketball game together.  Isn’t that a gift?   My heart is still smiling, but most of all, I am proud that it wasn’t me pushing that relationship on Bryce.   I never want Bryce to feel “obligated” regarding Bailey.  What I want is for them to both experience full and happy lives with the added bonus of each other.   Their relationship is still evolving and I love having a front row seat to watch.