As I clutched my coffee cup, this morning, as if I would die without my caffeine infusion, I prayed that the day would get better. It hasn’t begun in a stellar fashion, and I haven’t even been up for very long. Let’s preface this by saying, I slept like shit. Normally, my sleeping patterns rival Sleeping Beauty. Maybe it was the constant “I could have done better” mantra that was stuck on repeat and loudly playing in my head. You see, I finished my revisions for the five-hundreth time. Okay, it hasn’t been that many, but it sure feels like it. So, I completed it. My eyes burning. My fingers twitchy. I sent it back to the editor for another round of “how can I improve this even more”. Sigh.

When I finally entered a peaceful slumber, it was rudely interrupted by the sound of Presley vomiting. On my shag carpeting. Let that sink in for a moment. I know you are probably wondering who the hell has shag carpeting when you have pets, but that thought never entered my mind. I just liked it. Now, I don’t like it, simply because cleaning vomit off of it is tedious and difficult.

Nothing makes a person move faster than a vomiting pet. In fact, I am wondering if that counts as my cardio today. Anyway, I removed her from the room, to get the items to clean up the mess, and proceed to step in cat vomit. Super. Anyway, I am cleaning up everything using the flashlight from my phone in an effort to not wake up my sleeping spouse. I am so considerate. Although, I did ponder turning on a light, but that seemed harsh.

As I finish my cup of courage, all of my pets are now in a coma. I suppose vomiting everywhere is exhausting. Bless their hearts. While other people want to train their dogs to sit and stay, I simply want them to clean up their own messes. Whatever. I will just go back to writing on my second book in an effort to minimize the thoughts in my head. Hopefully, my delightful furry friends are vomit free the rest of the day.